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Jan. 16th, 2013

angelak: (Eye)
This week has been restorative time spent at 874 and with Jimmers. Last week at work I was highly motivated. This week has been harder. I just want to leave town. Now.

It's freezing. I don't like the cold. I went shopping for long sleeved shirts, because apparently the ones I had have vanished into the abyss of my house. Layering is my new thing, because it's getting cold out, and I feel that I have been freezing for days. Ross provided some low cost options for me. Pretty much outfitted for winter now, thank goodness. Some of the stuff will work for the Spring, once we make it through the stupid months here.

I have become stripey girl due to the striped shirts all over Ross. I better balance it out with some other shirts later or I will become very bored.

It feels great to still have my life and dog home and routine in 874. The Dachshunds appreciate it. I appreciate it too. Especially being alone. Being alone feels so, so good, and so vital. Even if it's for an hour in the morning. Jim goes to work at 430AM. He kisses me goodbye and is gone by the time I get out of bed. I am alone in the house then.
I miss that in Bellevue Home. I need a name for that place, but I haven't for the life of me figured out what it could be. It's actually a good balance if I think about it, none the less.
The Dachshund routine with me in it is very, very comforting.
I say the same thing every morning to them when I am ready to take them out.
They snooze in bed until I am ready to take them out.
The moment I say the magic words to get them moving, they spring into action.
The three of us like our morning routine.
And I always loved my 874 morning routine. Maybe it's because I had 100% control over it.
And that 100% control is important to me.

In other thoughts:
If I get back to my work outs the right way, I will likely feel even better. But the starvation diet made it unappealing to work out, even for me. And now I am lazy. As I have mentioned to Sean though, perhaps this isn't so bad. I re-injured my hamstring doing standing bow in a cold room in rehearsals for Rite of Sol months ago. It has been cranky ever since and I have been holding back on the left side of postures in yoga for months now. Perhaps this resting phase is the best thing I could do for my hamstring. My hope is that when I try again and start using my body in the fitness fashion (I miss it) - my hamstring will have made some healing leaps. I injured it by straining it and stretching in a cold room: March 2012. Then it healed. Then I re-injured it in October 2012. It takes a lot of time for the damn hamstring to chillax. Damn you, hammy. It also kills me in the hot room to have to hold back on it. I know I could progress my standing bow in class if it wasn't so jacked!! My flexibility is there, but the muscle cannot do it without tearing if I am injured.
I suck.
But I know this too, shall pass.
And given my shotty yoga practice of 2013 ...well, *shrugs* I wouldn't be getting any better anyway. Soon, I will be there I guess. Who knows. I'm lost. I trust the right things will happen at the right time. I must.

Back to work, yeah?

-Angela

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angelak

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