:X

:/
Stuff is just not the same anymore.

I missed the parties.
And life is changing. I know that's what I wanted.
I just. Feel at a loss.
Numb, a bit.
Mostly sad.
I hate not having any idea what the future holds in store.
I know - we never really do.
It's just now my dreams really are somewhat deflated.

I could have done things so many ways, and I didn't.
I could have just been happy like I was during the summer and spring.
And instead I just couldn't leave well enough alone.
And here I am.
Regretting myself.
I just feel like I am falling through a void. And that I have found that there is no bottom.
I'll be falling without the ground beneath me for a long time to come.
It's a long, slow road.
And I can only take it one step at a time.
All I can do is hope for the best. I hope he doesn't give up on me forever.
Maybe that's the wrong attitude.

-Angela