Dec. 1st, 2010

angelak: (Palm Trees)
It's been quite the end of year quarter, so far. Ever since my trip to Vegas, life has been flowing at a break-neck pace. And I absolutely love it. I love connecting with people - I love feeling like I've found myself again after a couple years of feeling lost - honestly.

Headed out to Santa Barbara, California on the evening of Thanksgiving in a very unorthodox celebration of meeting someone in Vegas that I connected with strongly. My family doesn't do - as I said, so much for Thanksgiving. As for Jim's side of family: This was a relief in a way to skip out on the trip to Portland this year. It is usually stressful for me, even if it is wonderfully fun also.

Jim's family is fantastic. I just know there are parts of the family that don't like me as much as others, and I'm not exactly "at ease." Whether this is something that will happen with every boyfriend's family, or whether it just so happens every boyfriend I've had, this has been the case... or maybe it started out with Steve Butler's (my first serious long term guy) Mom hating me... I'm not sure. I was awfully young when that whole "Steve's Mom hates you," thing started. Like 15 years old.

Needless to say, I had a blast in Santa Barbara. Sasha met me at the airport, we took the 1-2 hour drive from Los Angeles to Santa Barbara. I felt a little ungrounded probably due to lack of a solid, good, dinner on the drive. As per usual, I babbled and made the time go quickly. I have no idea wtf conversation I had, but I was excited to be on an adventure, excited to be with Sasha, excited to be in California, away from the snow, the cold, the diurnal pattern of my life.

Moment to moment heart centered connection seems to flow easily with Sasha, it's pretty much a rare situation with someone who can actually take me out of my head - not intentionally, and have me present in the moment. And it happens without effort. I'm not analyzing, gauging, and calculating myself, others. Sure, I'm still myself - but there's some level of ease that enters me that makes everything a little less of a "big deal," to me. I can't quite put words on it, and this is by far the first time I've tried.

Finally rolling into Santa Barbara, I met Anton - his good friend and room mate. Anton cracks me up, and was sufficiently amusing while making his Thanksgiving pasta while singing "I wish you a merry turkey-day," to the tune of "I wish you a Merry Christmas." I don't think you've lived until you've heard a Russian singing "I wish you a merry turkey-day," while preparing ground turkey pasta dressed with Russian mayonnaise and regular ketchup...

Clearly buzzed from his piss-beer - I couldn't help but immediately take a liking to him. Eventually Anton finished his turkey pasta and went to bed. And so did we.

A quick summary of the fun things we did: Farmer's market in Santa Barbara, visited a beautiful park on the ocean and hung out drinking tea and coffee on the California coast... with goods from the farmer's market, we made 2 different raw pies together. I had the ABSOLUTE honor of going to his first Bikram class, and we took 3 total classes while I was in town. Hit the gym and hit the elliptical machine. Walked around Santa Barbara... went to a couple of movies (Morning Glory and Love and Other Drugs).
Also tried out some great places to eat (not-raw, but some really healthy places with a lot of veggie menu items).

Natural Cafe and Sojourner were two cool restaurants. I also got to meet Roma, and on my last day in SB, we took him to a Bikram class too! IT was AWESOME. Roma is this big, super buff, built Ukrainian guy. I nicknamed him "Tiny," because he was so sturdy.
Did some hanging out at his "office," where he usually goes in the evening to do some web work. Office=His Favorite Coffeeshop. We went there twice, I did some web work too, transferring my domain to Bluehost from where-ever I bought it (long story).

I have 2 domains to work on websites that will eventually be the face of a self defense project.

StrongWomenStrongDefense.com, and kickassselfdefense.com

Really, I just need a face to begin teaching people self defense.
It was super fun to have a guy to go to Yoga with - although I love going with myself, girls, I don't care. Yoga is awesome to share with people you care most about though - and that's my take on it.
I have more to write but I am running out of time!!!

So this will have to do for now. It was hard to leave California. The ordeal home was a story in itself, which I cannot say the trip out was. I can say that I feel like my growth in the past month and a half has been amazing. I just have to keep remembering that I am strong and that I am capable, and that all my goals are within my reach - and not to get scared and run away from them or shut them down.

Anyways, a lot of heart centered connecting was done, and I came home feeling so refreshed and energized.
Life keeps throwing me beautiful things right now, and I absolutely deserve them.

-Angela

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