Starting today

[angelak]

I'm going to try to be me.

For the first time in years.
I'm going to live for me, and nobody else.
Is that scary?
Of course it is.

It that easy?
Of course not!

I'm going to make some personal changes for once and for all.
It's the month of change and damnit, I'm done letting this world drag me down.
I'm going to be the me that I've been long before I met this pagan community or any men.
I love you all - and it's about time I take care of me.
I'm of little use to you, those that I love, if I am nothing more than an angry, resentful shell of what I once was.

And anyone who dares talk about my insanity behind my back can go eat worms.

I'm going to be okay.
Maybe I'll fall and skin my knees along the way -
Yet - I'm doing this for me. I owe it to myself.

I don't know what made this happen.

2-3 months of slow realization?

I can do it.
Good times to be forever cherished.
Bad ones to be learned from.
Yeah, damnit. We young ones learn and change and morph.
And if I'm your cliche 21 year old, then so be it.
That's all I can be.
If something gives. Forgive me. Whoever you are.

-Angela