Today will be better.
Jun. 9th, 2006 07:36 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
angelakToday is clearly going to be better than yesterday.
And it’s always wise to remember that when people “push our buttons,” that is exactly what they’re doing. Merely and only. They are buttons and not necessarily real problems – and if we are sensitive about things, it doesn’t mean that’s how the things that we are being sensitive to are meant to be taken.
This being said, I feel good today and I refuse to let my work-confidence go anywhere aside from up.
Four things REALLY helped me last night, and in no particular order:
- Hiking
- Mel
- Jim
- Gilmore Girls
Really, 4 of my current favorite things right now :P
This morning the following is going to cause me to be better and less attitude:
- Coffee
- A good night’s rest from last night
- My Will
- Believing in myself
- The prospect of partying tonight (though I don’t even think I want to get too serious aside from dancing …) Yeay – Mel said Ryland would be our DD. That’s one less thing for me to worry about.
- I get to see my girls tonight!
- I possibly get to see my guy! (He’s not sure if his friends are heading to Seattle or not, and IF they are, we’ll meet up with his crew.)
And in just a few minutes, I am going to head across the street to the police department to find SC and get this show on the road with the external power source.
Gods help me – because I really need to resolve this before my boss strangles me to death and duct tapes my mouth shut.
NOTE to universe: DO NOT put Angela in the middle of EVERYTHING if you think silence will ensue. If there are people in my proximity. I talk. It reminds me of all the student-teacher conferences my parents EVER went to.
“Your daughter is excellent with her schoolwork, but she needs to work on not talking so much.” Every year.
Alright people. I get it. I visit a lot.
Just had to write that out. I saw a parallel as to how some of my employers in the past (Bakery) and Chris was reacting yesterday.
Although his demeanor was very unChrislike. This matter must be getting escalated through means that I have no knowledge of. This is my best guess. One minute he was praising me for detective work and the next he was not so praise-like.
Ego took a hit yesterday.
Today – damnit, I am the best I can be at this job. And if that isn’t enough – then it just isn’t enough. And that ain’t the end of the world either. As long as I have a job to pay my bills with.
My objective is to take this and make it into something useful. Key?
I've been telling myself I need to be better at job for a while.
Okay. Well. Why don't I make this a huge excuse to make it a catalyst? Deal. Consider it done.
So, although he made a personal button-hitting comment yesterday… I realize I possibly read FAR too much into it and that was purely due to my already-having-been-on-edge ness.
It didn’t help that I developed a yeast infection and I was getting RATHER pissy not just because of the work pressure, but also the really-uncomfortable-this-is-when-I-wish-I-was-a-guy-ness.
That being said? I hope that it will be squared away by Monday so I can at least get laid. Jesus.
I think it was getting back on the pill that triggered this.
One last edit though - Jim thinks I'm crazy and really athletic. Something about obsessive hiking?? I don't feel THAT obsessive. *shrugs* He has a high opinion of my physical habits. His terms? "Crazy!" It feels SO good though. My body thanks me - and my self confidence goes up when I am more active. Plain and simple. I feel prettier, I feel stronger, and I am generally happier.
And with that, I leave you to your regularly scheduled LJ reading.
-Angela
And it’s always wise to remember that when people “push our buttons,” that is exactly what they’re doing. Merely and only. They are buttons and not necessarily real problems – and if we are sensitive about things, it doesn’t mean that’s how the things that we are being sensitive to are meant to be taken.
This being said, I feel good today and I refuse to let my work-confidence go anywhere aside from up.
Four things REALLY helped me last night, and in no particular order:
- Hiking
- Mel
- Jim
- Gilmore Girls
Really, 4 of my current favorite things right now :P
This morning the following is going to cause me to be better and less attitude:
- Coffee
- A good night’s rest from last night
- My Will
- Believing in myself
- The prospect of partying tonight (though I don’t even think I want to get too serious aside from dancing …) Yeay – Mel said Ryland would be our DD. That’s one less thing for me to worry about.
- I get to see my girls tonight!
- I possibly get to see my guy! (He’s not sure if his friends are heading to Seattle or not, and IF they are, we’ll meet up with his crew.)
And in just a few minutes, I am going to head across the street to the police department to find SC and get this show on the road with the external power source.
Gods help me – because I really need to resolve this before my boss strangles me to death and duct tapes my mouth shut.
NOTE to universe: DO NOT put Angela in the middle of EVERYTHING if you think silence will ensue. If there are people in my proximity. I talk. It reminds me of all the student-teacher conferences my parents EVER went to.
“Your daughter is excellent with her schoolwork, but she needs to work on not talking so much.” Every year.
Alright people. I get it. I visit a lot.
Just had to write that out. I saw a parallel as to how some of my employers in the past (Bakery) and Chris was reacting yesterday.
Although his demeanor was very unChrislike. This matter must be getting escalated through means that I have no knowledge of. This is my best guess. One minute he was praising me for detective work and the next he was not so praise-like.
Ego took a hit yesterday.
Today – damnit, I am the best I can be at this job. And if that isn’t enough – then it just isn’t enough. And that ain’t the end of the world either. As long as I have a job to pay my bills with.
My objective is to take this and make it into something useful. Key?
I've been telling myself I need to be better at job for a while.
Okay. Well. Why don't I make this a huge excuse to make it a catalyst? Deal. Consider it done.
So, although he made a personal button-hitting comment yesterday… I realize I possibly read FAR too much into it and that was purely due to my already-having-been-on-edge ness.
It didn’t help that I developed a yeast infection and I was getting RATHER pissy not just because of the work pressure, but also the really-uncomfortable-this-is-when-I-wish-I-was-a-guy-ness.
That being said? I hope that it will be squared away by Monday so I can at least get laid. Jesus.
I think it was getting back on the pill that triggered this.
One last edit though - Jim thinks I'm crazy and really athletic. Something about obsessive hiking?? I don't feel THAT obsessive. *shrugs* He has a high opinion of my physical habits. His terms? "Crazy!" It feels SO good though. My body thanks me - and my self confidence goes up when I am more active. Plain and simple. I feel prettier, I feel stronger, and I am generally happier.
And with that, I leave you to your regularly scheduled LJ reading.
-Angela
