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angelakYour heartset is 100 times more powerful than your mindset.
Where passion is stronger, you get further. The more complacent we are, the less apt we are to move forward.
I'm not saying "go with the flow," and be lazy. I'm saying, follow the path that is the most natural and usually that will be the one that yields the best results.
Putting this into practice is a whole evolution of itself.
Right now I am trying a lot of new things and experiencing a huge amount of growth. But my focus is pretty low and because I am experiencing so much at once, I feel like in some ways I've gone so far, and in other ways the sheer multitude at which I am changing is so large that it slows down my progress.
Been truly enjoying the weather as a form of blessing. Perspective here is what is needed. The heat of the ambient air, and my own lack of air conditioning is a testament that if you look at it right - the heat will be miserable.
If you look at it right, the heat is also enjoyable and fun.
Especially since my car has AC. I can infuse myself every now and then.
Today I took the dogs in to the office briefly when most everyone went home to allow them some bounce back time - along with dunking them both in a cold tub of water long enough to cool down their core.
They both are doing okay. I am keeping a close eye on Rufus, since he is so elderly.
Fritz as well, but his body is obviously a lot more hardy given his youth.
Anyways.
There is so much to write and so little time and focus to get it all out of my head.
I will have to accept that right now - the rate of my perspectives and the enormity of my journey in this moment is too large to be recorded as closely as I'd like. Part of it is that I am in the middle of it. I am walking the path -
And part of it is that I am so busy with work, exercise, physical therapy, and the learnings, that I run out of time.
I am up at 5AM every day - as today was day 20 of the 30 day 5AM trial.
I do not miss my old habits. I spend this time exercising, meditating, cleaning house, reading, or just sipping on a cup of joe thinking about where I am venturing. I'll be honest; this is the best thing that has happened to me. The evolution is not easy, I am not problem-free or quite pain-free. The path is hard. But I find that I am able to carry the burdens differently.
It is hard work with my legs right now. I am doing a lot of different PT - and it feels like my legs are constantly fatigued. But that has to mean something over the long term - right? There are moments of pain free ness. I also realize my tendons are not the ones in pain any more. It is muscle tightness that pulls on the alignment of my knees. Particularly when I walk a lot of stairs. Sometimes when I do my pt exercises also.
It progresses though. I see results. Each week shifts.
I trust my therapist. I wasn't able to say that early on. But my gut has told me repeatedly that Tiann will lead me in the direction of supreme health. I am listening to her and following her guidance. I am not rushing anymore. I see no point. And I have gotten the furthest with her now, than I have in the last 1+ year.
I wish I had more, but I am given to go find a bednight piece of fruit. I am working on the 1-2 pant sizes I gained over the course of 3-4 weeks/medical leave. And dinner was light tonight. In order to sleep, I think I need 1 more something. Working hard at believing I am still beautiful at my 1-2 sizes bigger - working hard at also heading back to the place where my entire wardrobe fits again. Right now is rough because in a month I went from having a wardrobe to sifting through all of my crap to find the stuff that I wore over a year ago. Joy.
My journey is unfolding, though - how it should. And I am beginning to take less for granted my progress.
-Angela
Where passion is stronger, you get further. The more complacent we are, the less apt we are to move forward.
I'm not saying "go with the flow," and be lazy. I'm saying, follow the path that is the most natural and usually that will be the one that yields the best results.
Putting this into practice is a whole evolution of itself.
Right now I am trying a lot of new things and experiencing a huge amount of growth. But my focus is pretty low and because I am experiencing so much at once, I feel like in some ways I've gone so far, and in other ways the sheer multitude at which I am changing is so large that it slows down my progress.
Been truly enjoying the weather as a form of blessing. Perspective here is what is needed. The heat of the ambient air, and my own lack of air conditioning is a testament that if you look at it right - the heat will be miserable.
If you look at it right, the heat is also enjoyable and fun.
Especially since my car has AC. I can infuse myself every now and then.
Today I took the dogs in to the office briefly when most everyone went home to allow them some bounce back time - along with dunking them both in a cold tub of water long enough to cool down their core.
They both are doing okay. I am keeping a close eye on Rufus, since he is so elderly.
Fritz as well, but his body is obviously a lot more hardy given his youth.
Anyways.
There is so much to write and so little time and focus to get it all out of my head.
I will have to accept that right now - the rate of my perspectives and the enormity of my journey in this moment is too large to be recorded as closely as I'd like. Part of it is that I am in the middle of it. I am walking the path -
And part of it is that I am so busy with work, exercise, physical therapy, and the learnings, that I run out of time.
I am up at 5AM every day - as today was day 20 of the 30 day 5AM trial.
I do not miss my old habits. I spend this time exercising, meditating, cleaning house, reading, or just sipping on a cup of joe thinking about where I am venturing. I'll be honest; this is the best thing that has happened to me. The evolution is not easy, I am not problem-free or quite pain-free. The path is hard. But I find that I am able to carry the burdens differently.
It is hard work with my legs right now. I am doing a lot of different PT - and it feels like my legs are constantly fatigued. But that has to mean something over the long term - right? There are moments of pain free ness. I also realize my tendons are not the ones in pain any more. It is muscle tightness that pulls on the alignment of my knees. Particularly when I walk a lot of stairs. Sometimes when I do my pt exercises also.
It progresses though. I see results. Each week shifts.
I trust my therapist. I wasn't able to say that early on. But my gut has told me repeatedly that Tiann will lead me in the direction of supreme health. I am listening to her and following her guidance. I am not rushing anymore. I see no point. And I have gotten the furthest with her now, than I have in the last 1+ year.
I wish I had more, but I am given to go find a bednight piece of fruit. I am working on the 1-2 pant sizes I gained over the course of 3-4 weeks/medical leave. And dinner was light tonight. In order to sleep, I think I need 1 more something. Working hard at believing I am still beautiful at my 1-2 sizes bigger - working hard at also heading back to the place where my entire wardrobe fits again. Right now is rough because in a month I went from having a wardrobe to sifting through all of my crap to find the stuff that I wore over a year ago. Joy.
My journey is unfolding, though - how it should. And I am beginning to take less for granted my progress.
-Angela
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no subject
Date: 2009-07-31 12:54 pm (UTC)Glad to hear that you are doing well, on the right path and that the doggies are good too. ^_^