Sean Ciall
Jul. 27th, 2004 10:11 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
angelakI would love nothing more than to post about FoL as soon as possible. But this post will have to wait, as something *ELSE* is deep on my mind RIGHT now.
I, like everyone else on or off the ritual team, has a unique and personal experience and story to tell. But right now--- it seems thwarted by a certain level of questioning that hit me directly after this weekend. It came from an outside source, and after all of the Saturday/energy/post ritual emotions....
....
Well, it’s really been the wrong time to ask my heart of hearts to explore some of these things. So many things to say, so little words to say them. So much hurt and discomfort I have felt in regards to any of this. Sean ciall itself, I still have faith in for regards of working magickal method--- it’s the publicity, the lousy web-page, the witchvox article, and documentation and connotation that has surrounded it. It all scares me now, because it’s all so close to my heart, the group, the methods, everything.
I had already thought to myself that I needed to re-write the way it was stated to something less wordy for web use. But now... I just don’t know if I want any of it on the web.
Criticism to me right now seemed impossible to bear and actually take it away logically. My head is so deep in the experience and the group that it is very hard to read the things I began reading last night.
Mostly--- a ton based off of THIS post.
Basically calling us a bunch of faking/cultists. Alright. So be it. I had personally agreed that none of it really was written in a way that most people could read and understand as truly OUR group. I don't feel that the writing out there, reflects sean ciall the way I think it should. It's not written with the feeling I get from our circle. The writing in all of Bobby’s documentation was kind of over the top. But there are now gaps on so many levels and disagreements from other people that seem to point towards lack of authenticity of some of the sean ciall claims. Suddenly our group is associated with a bunch of wanna-bes.
Joshua told me to take it as a grain of salt. My head wasn’t at a space where I could take much of anything as a “grain of salt.”
I want to bring these specific issues to the spell circle and discuss the specifics mentioned in these critiques. If a group can’t uphold scrutiny... where IS it’s validity?
While going through all this, a myriad of things went through me:
2 separate articles, opinionated editorials so to speak, I read one after the other, including this post, made me so angry, so hurt, so scared, and so confused, like I would have to lose my group because it was being associated with fools. Or that they were calling us fools.
I don’t know how I feel now. It’s a matter of sorting through all the crap and understanding my feelings. I wish I could talk with Cheryl.
*sighs*
Anybody offer any thoughts on this?
Where do we take these questions? How will people react to these questions?
How "ancient," is sean ciall?
Later I’ll post my ritual experiences.
I strongly recommend all sean ciall participants to read
THIS post.
-Angela
I, like everyone else on or off the ritual team, has a unique and personal experience and story to tell. But right now--- it seems thwarted by a certain level of questioning that hit me directly after this weekend. It came from an outside source, and after all of the Saturday/energy/post ritual emotions....
....
Well, it’s really been the wrong time to ask my heart of hearts to explore some of these things. So many things to say, so little words to say them. So much hurt and discomfort I have felt in regards to any of this. Sean ciall itself, I still have faith in for regards of working magickal method--- it’s the publicity, the lousy web-page, the witchvox article, and documentation and connotation that has surrounded it. It all scares me now, because it’s all so close to my heart, the group, the methods, everything.
I had already thought to myself that I needed to re-write the way it was stated to something less wordy for web use. But now... I just don’t know if I want any of it on the web.
Criticism to me right now seemed impossible to bear and actually take it away logically. My head is so deep in the experience and the group that it is very hard to read the things I began reading last night.
Mostly--- a ton based off of THIS post.
Basically calling us a bunch of faking/cultists. Alright. So be it. I had personally agreed that none of it really was written in a way that most people could read and understand as truly OUR group. I don't feel that the writing out there, reflects sean ciall the way I think it should. It's not written with the feeling I get from our circle. The writing in all of Bobby’s documentation was kind of over the top. But there are now gaps on so many levels and disagreements from other people that seem to point towards lack of authenticity of some of the sean ciall claims. Suddenly our group is associated with a bunch of wanna-bes.
Joshua told me to take it as a grain of salt. My head wasn’t at a space where I could take much of anything as a “grain of salt.”
I want to bring these specific issues to the spell circle and discuss the specifics mentioned in these critiques. If a group can’t uphold scrutiny... where IS it’s validity?
While going through all this, a myriad of things went through me:
2 separate articles, opinionated editorials so to speak, I read one after the other, including this post, made me so angry, so hurt, so scared, and so confused, like I would have to lose my group because it was being associated with fools. Or that they were calling us fools.
I don’t know how I feel now. It’s a matter of sorting through all the crap and understanding my feelings. I wish I could talk with Cheryl.
*sighs*
Anybody offer any thoughts on this?
Where do we take these questions? How will people react to these questions?
How "ancient," is sean ciall?
Later I’ll post my ritual experiences.
I strongly recommend all sean ciall participants to read
THIS post.
-Angela
