angelak | Life stuff

It's October. Really, October is my favorite time of the year. I'm not all about fair weather, sunshine. Every year it feels like I am connected to this season. This year, I feel cold, perhaps a bit crisp. Ripe for shifting.

I've had a year full of the same lesson over and over again. A holding pattern for me in 2008.
I was telling Jim last night, the mortgage fun reminds me of my knee injury. In a different manifestation. I know I'm readying myself for a new life soon. I know in a week (or so – and at this point, I am going to give it just over a week in my heart for an answer on the loan) that we'll know. Our last push loan ap will be commenced, or entirely over.

Escrow would be nice.
But if not, I've got to learn to take my losses and build my life in another plane of reality.
I drink my coffee, glance at my cute pumkpin, and wonder what is in store for me. Next week I have another doctor's appointment, Thursday – to evaluate my knee. UW med center this time. I'm not messing around. I want an MRI. I WANT AN ANSWER. Something is not right.

I can run and it doesn't hurt me. I can stand for 10-20 minutes or walk around stores, and it is suddenly giving me hell. It was never quite as acutely painful until the last 2 weeks. I'm not sure what has happened. I haven't been sure this entire time.

On April 14th, 2008 - I circuit trained hard core outside on grass. It involved lots of jumping, for which I had not trained up to do. I was naïve, uneducated. Jim had suggested I try the new routine he had done in drill. Now he is out of the army, and I am still injured from this 18 minute session.

I over trained.

And now, 6 months later... I wonder what to do and how to cope with my life regarding this. I also called EAP to try and get counseling. I get 3 free sessions. I'm a bit leary seeing as I may need counseling, but who knows how affordable that will be for me once we move.
The life shift financially will be different. Especially if the loan does work out.

On the fitness level, I keep trying my best to not over do it, but I cannot very well sit and do nothing. Especially when the things I do to work out aren't always affecting my legs.
The thing is, I feel like increased bloodflow tends to help the pain go away.
When I ran the 5K, my knee felt better than it had in weeks. When I worked out last night in CT – it seemed to alleviate my pain. More so than 800mg of ibuprophen every 4 hours for a week.
Icing when I can, or heating when I can. I should ice more. I backed off when I forgot to put my ice packs in the freezer.

Yes. I've been trying. No, I can't do that for months. I enjoy my liver.
I also think that after a problem that has existed this long, a doctor should have no problems scanning my damn knees. It used to be one knee. Now it is both.

Ahhhh... well.

MY new hobby though, is TEA. I went to Teavanna accidentally (or specifically) to buy tea. And then spent wayyyyyy more than intended. But... it is the BEST tea ever. I also found a really cool tea set on sale and ordered it off the web. So, it will be exciting for Jim and I to share tea (he loves tea too).

Yeay.

And on to Friday, starting the rest of the loan application, yada yada.

You know. I never created an injury tag, but I think I will now :P

-Angela