1 year anniversary of my injury
Apr. 14th, 2009 05:11 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
angelakAgain – it has been some time since I updated my live journal.
I really feel it's time to update!
Today marks the 1 year anniversary of my injury making itself known.
12 months ago this journey began.
Somehow I've embraced my new set of life challenges and there are so many things I cannot put into words. Except that I've fully accepted where my life is today -
and I feel happy with my life right now. I wasn't sure that I could be at that place for a long time, without returning “to life as it was.” But now I know I cannot drive a car or live my life looking backwards. You'll crash every time, and you'll never get what you think you wanted.
I'm very optimistic about healing and where I am. It may not be 100%, and it may be months before I can be painfree or even do little things that so many people take for granted.
But how can I minimize all the lessons this pain and injury have taught me along the way?
I found Bikram Yoga through this injury.
I would never have tried it without the desperation I had with my injury. And now I can't imagine life without it. Maybe I won't be the 4-6 day a week practitioner that I am today, but I know it is something I'll want in my life as I continue to grow stronger in the tendons and in life. I feel like it helped me grip my life again, beat the depression without meds, and appreciate all the things in my life that I was so unable to see when I was so low from life throwing me off my horse.
I'm back to getting that 100% satisfied physical body that I so worked hard for in 2007, and I'm back to respecting the choices I make and even living life within my job without going totally nuts.
I have so much more patience to power through the little things.
The little things that can either make or break you.
I've seen the worst of myself, and I feel like in the last 12 months I came out the other side. I'm not uninjured yet. But the light is growing closer at the end of the tunnel.
And today, to celebrate my 1 year anniversary of all this, I am going to go for a 20-25 minute run as per doctor approved. Today standing has hurt me so much less! This makes me so hopeful.
Mass on Saturday childing was not too bad considering.
And Mass was after other more standing activities earlier in the day.
The day after mass and earlier muchly standing activities equated to a low pain day. I was shocked. I felt sure I would pay for my Saturday with more sensitivity. I could cry, because the last couple of days have been very good on the knees.
So today, (it's been a week since my last run, which doesn't bother me – more rest=more tendon recovery time) I will run again and think of my life and how lucky I am to be able to run at all. 10, 15, 20, or 25 minutes is golden to me. When before, I used to act like anything less than 40 minutes did not count.
I look back at that me and I just shake my head. How could I have known what I had? I'm not that same girl I was. And I am very thankful that I am who I am today. I miss a lot of things – hiking, standing and talking without even thinking about how long that is, walking about, carrying stuff, pushing myself with no worry – but I don't miss the fact I took all those things for granted.
I truly have an appreciation I don't think I could have gotten without living through this.
Here I am. Today.
Strong and lean in different ways.
The runner in me doesn't ever fade, and it doesn't matter if that's for less than once it was. I also have this gut feeling that one day, this will all be a memory.
I can beat this thing and come out pain free. But I will never ever forget to take precaution for my body.
On other notes; life is becoming way more social, and I am making slow advances spiritually and magickally. These things are nice.
Me and Jim are also very strong right now. This bodes well.
-Angela
I really feel it's time to update!
Today marks the 1 year anniversary of my injury making itself known.
12 months ago this journey began.
Somehow I've embraced my new set of life challenges and there are so many things I cannot put into words. Except that I've fully accepted where my life is today -
and I feel happy with my life right now. I wasn't sure that I could be at that place for a long time, without returning “to life as it was.” But now I know I cannot drive a car or live my life looking backwards. You'll crash every time, and you'll never get what you think you wanted.
I'm very optimistic about healing and where I am. It may not be 100%, and it may be months before I can be painfree or even do little things that so many people take for granted.
But how can I minimize all the lessons this pain and injury have taught me along the way?
I found Bikram Yoga through this injury.
I would never have tried it without the desperation I had with my injury. And now I can't imagine life without it. Maybe I won't be the 4-6 day a week practitioner that I am today, but I know it is something I'll want in my life as I continue to grow stronger in the tendons and in life. I feel like it helped me grip my life again, beat the depression without meds, and appreciate all the things in my life that I was so unable to see when I was so low from life throwing me off my horse.
I'm back to getting that 100% satisfied physical body that I so worked hard for in 2007, and I'm back to respecting the choices I make and even living life within my job without going totally nuts.
I have so much more patience to power through the little things.
The little things that can either make or break you.
I've seen the worst of myself, and I feel like in the last 12 months I came out the other side. I'm not uninjured yet. But the light is growing closer at the end of the tunnel.
And today, to celebrate my 1 year anniversary of all this, I am going to go for a 20-25 minute run as per doctor approved. Today standing has hurt me so much less! This makes me so hopeful.
Mass on Saturday childing was not too bad considering.
And Mass was after other more standing activities earlier in the day.
The day after mass and earlier muchly standing activities equated to a low pain day. I was shocked. I felt sure I would pay for my Saturday with more sensitivity. I could cry, because the last couple of days have been very good on the knees.
So today, (it's been a week since my last run, which doesn't bother me – more rest=more tendon recovery time) I will run again and think of my life and how lucky I am to be able to run at all. 10, 15, 20, or 25 minutes is golden to me. When before, I used to act like anything less than 40 minutes did not count.
I look back at that me and I just shake my head. How could I have known what I had? I'm not that same girl I was. And I am very thankful that I am who I am today. I miss a lot of things – hiking, standing and talking without even thinking about how long that is, walking about, carrying stuff, pushing myself with no worry – but I don't miss the fact I took all those things for granted.
I truly have an appreciation I don't think I could have gotten without living through this.
Here I am. Today.
Strong and lean in different ways.
The runner in me doesn't ever fade, and it doesn't matter if that's for less than once it was. I also have this gut feeling that one day, this will all be a memory.
I can beat this thing and come out pain free. But I will never ever forget to take precaution for my body.
On other notes; life is becoming way more social, and I am making slow advances spiritually and magickally. These things are nice.
Me and Jim are also very strong right now. This bodes well.
-Angela
